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Guest behavior

Featured in Bridal Fantasy Magazine

By Rene Strauss

Maybe you think you know everything about wedding etiquette, but I guarantee that there are many offenses that guests don’t realize they’re committing when they attend friends and family member’s nuptials. To make sure you don’t make a major snafu, heed this list of the worst social crimes a wedding guest can commit.

  1. Wear white:

Sure, wedding gowns these days can be blush or even black. But even if the bride isn’t wearing white, that doesn’t mean you can. And if you know that the bride is wearing a colour other than white, try not to don a dress of the same exact shade. This is her day, after all.

2. Crash the bride’s room:

The second most common faux pas I see is when friends outside the immediate bridal party crash the bride’s dressing room just to wish her well. The gesture is absolutely gracious- but the timing isn’t. If you weren’t invited to hang out with the bride while she gets ready, wait to share your congratulations at the wedding.

3. Misuse your smartphone:

If it were up to me, everyone would leave their phone at home when attending a wedding. From guests snapping photos during the ceremony instead of paying attention to the moment to posting photos of the bride and groom to social media without asking, guests tend to use their phone is ways that are disruptive and rude. If you can’t part with your technology, at the very least turn off your ringer for the ceremony.

4. Change your seat:

Many guests look through the seating cards to find out who is sitting where. Figuring out a seating plan was a difficult enough process for the couple and having to deal with musical chairs (or requests for a change) is just too much when they’re trying to enjoy their special day.

5. Make side comments during speeches:

One of the most annoying thing guests do is not pay attention while speeches are being made and continue to chatter, making it difficult for those that care to listen. When it is speech time: HUSH! Yes, that also means keeping your whispered comments to yourself until the speeches have ended.

6. Swap your food order:

Usually, you are asked for your meal preference on the RSVP. This is for a for a reason: The caterer or hotel requires a pretty close to accurate count of who’s eating what so that they may order correct quantities. I have attended many weddings where someone decides that they like what the guest next to them was presented with and they “change their order,” leaving a person with dietary restrictions without their meal choice.

7.Complain about minimal cost:

While the bride and groom are your hosts for the evening, they may not be able to cover every single cost, such as parking at their wedding. Granted it is a gracious offering when there is no charge, but in the event, the wedding you attend has not arranged for paid parking, please do not make negative comments. Each person has their own set of priorities and budget- if you are close enough to be invited and attend the wedding, then you should be respectful and not make negative or hurtful comments.

8. Drink too much:

Weddings are celebrations and many take place on Friday or Saturday evening so no one is inclined to leave early. But this also gives leeway to imbibing a bit too much. Don’t get sloshed and try to drive home. The bridal party doesn’t want to manage your lack of management- they want to stay and enjoy the fun! (This is when services like Uber comes to the rescue)

9. Grab Décor:

Table decorations belong to the rental company that provided them unless otherwise indicated. Guests that walk away with decorative votive or pretty napkin rings don’t realize that the happy couple will be charged for these items when the total count is not returned.

10. Hang around too late:

Even if there’s an after-party the ends wee into the morning hours, at some point, the newlyweds want to have some alone time. Therefore, don’t begin an impromptu after- after party in their honeymoon suite or try to convince them to continue on at the bar. The party is over when the couple says it is- respect that.

More about Rene Strauss

An international bridal stylist to royalty, celebrities, and heiresses, Rene Strauss starred in her own TLC Slice Network reality show “Brides of Beverly Hills” which continues to gain new markets worldwide. Film, television, and commercial productions seek out her expertise regarding the design, construction, and trends of dresses as well as the traditions and cultural nuances of weddings.

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